Recommendations

I will start with a very short summary what I found useful, and what I will be considering for upcoming Fire Kasina retreats. In the sections after this I will share more about my background, preparation, and experiences and learnings at the retreat.
I would recommend:

start doing Fire Kasina as the home practice some time before the retreat
feeling out some mantras before leaving for the retreat, but only being loosely attached to them
being really mindful of current mind states to not negatively affect other retreatants, and asking for help when needed
having a comfortable set up for seated meditation sessions
leaning into the Magick
being dynamic and malleable in practice
playing around and having tons of fun!

Introduction and Background

In August 2023, I had the privilege to get to immerse myself in a 3-week Fire Kasina meditation retreat.
This marked a significant milestone in my spiritual exploration, as it was my first proper meditation retreat, an opportunity to delve deeper into the mind-blowing practice I had first been introduced to a few years back.

My meditation practice began in 2018, and in 2019 I, together with my partner, discovered the Fire Kasina practice through a thought-provoking podcast episode titled “The Liberating Practice of Fire Kasina” (from “Deconstructing Yourself”, with Michael Taft). In this podcast, Daniel Ingram shared profound insights, experiences and instructions related to the Kasina practice, igniting my curiosity and sparking the desire to explore this meditation method.
I’m not a particularly visual person, and up until then I had more or less just experienced blackness behind my eyelids so I wasn’t expecting too much when sitting down with the candle for the first time. To my astonishment, and excitement though, as soon as I closed my eyes: there it was! The red dot… Such a clear, “solid”, and fascinating object, and it absolutely blew my mind. Not only that, but it feels to me that something got unlocked, and since then my visual field has been distinctly more active.
At that time I think I did Fire Kasina for a couple of months as the daily practice, but then went on to explore other meditation techniques. It’s always been in the background since then though, and resurfaces now and again, either for a single session or for a time period.
This retreat became a pivotal point in my meditation journey, offering such a beautiful and fantastic opportunity to apply the principles I had learned, and provided time and space to fully immerse myself in the Fire Kasina practice for an extended amount of time. Despite having high expectations, it turned out to be so much more rewarding than I had anticipated.
Over the next few sections, I will share the details of this life-changing experience, including the challenges, revelations, and personal growth that unfolded during those three weeks.

Preparation

In preparation for the retreat I decided to do Fire Kasina as the daily home practice for maybe the 1.5-2 months leading up to the retreat, and I think that was a very good decision. There is a lot of helpful and accessible information at the Fire Kasina website and going through the glossary and some of the accounts of previous retreats was invaluable.
For example, the discussions about whether or not to use a mantra, and what to consider with regards to choosing which mantra/s to use. I love singing and chanting, but I have not worked with mantras, particularly not during formal sits, outside of dedicated Kirtan sessions, and playing around with testing out some different ones in the lead up to the retreat was really fun, interesting, and rewarding.
Going through, and getting familiar with, the glossary both meant that it was easier to discuss practice and experiences with the other retreatants, and was also really inspirational for what to look for and explore. My partner and I take practice seriously, and are aware of the darker states that are part of things, but it was still really valuable to be reminded about the absolute importance of sharing and reaching out when needing/wanting help, and for being aware of, and limiting, how your difficult states affects the people around you.

Daily Routine

So, what did a typical day at the retreat look like?
The days followed more or less the same schedule, with slight variations depending on the current state, or if we decided to do something special, like a group ritual.
My partner and I were doing Resh at each station (a devotional sun ritual performed at dawn, noon, dusk and midnight) so we got up at sunset and started the day with the dawn sun adoration. After that a seated Fire Kasina session, generally 45min – 1h, followed by an Ashtanga vinyasa yoga session.
After that, another seated Fire Kasina session and then it was time for the first meal of the day. Except for the days we spent in complete silence we spent that meal talking about what was going on with our practice, what had been happening since the last check in, and everybody had a chance to provide tips, advice and support for each other. (These updates were recorded and will be published on the Fire Kasina website when they have been transcribed and cleaned up).

The period between the meals (we had two meal times per day) I generally spent alternating between seated, and walking Fire Kasina sessions, with additions of time in the pool (floating, walking, using the ripples in the water and lines at the bottom as visual focus, etc.) and outside sits. For the walking meditations we had set up lamps (we took off the lamp shades so that we could look at the bare light bulb) on either end of a hall, which turned out fantastically, and in combination with the beautiful art and the white walls, floor and ceiling, it was a perfect place to nourish the open eyed red dot.

After dinner I’d generally spend about 4-5 h alternating seated and walking Fire Kasina sessions.
The day was generally ended with the midnight Resh before getting to bed.

Experiences and Learnings

This retreat was so rewarding and expanding in so many ways and aspects, and in this section I will try and describe some of the most interesting and profound experiences and learnings.

Mantras and Embracing Dynamic Practice

I really love that the Fire Kasina practice is so conducive for both concentration, and insight practice. I didn’t have any strong desires as to which way my retreat would go, and one of the most important learnings in general from the retreat for me was to learn to be more dynamic and playful with my practice. Previously I have had a tendency to get a bit rigid and inflexible if I have decided on looking for, or exploring, something in particular, and there were quite a few times when it became quite clear that seeing those tensions and relaxing them had very positive outcomes. It felt like there were some feeling of limitations, and knots that dissolved with these relaxations, and it left my mind more open and susceptible to nuances of experiences.

One example of the positive effects of loosening rigidity was with regards to the use of mantras. I had come prepared with two distinct mantras: one with fiery and active energy, and the other for cultivating a watery, compassionate, loving energy, to be utilised if things got too intense. It was my plan to switch between them depending on my mental state and the needs of the moment.
However, early on in the retreat, I found that the mantras I had chosen beforehand didn’t feel quite right, they didn’t flow. Then during a seated Fire Kasina session a line from a song started repeating in my mind. The line, and song, turned out to be a dedication to the Lord of Fire. That line kept on being played in my mind until I accepted that maybe this would be a better mantra to go with, and as soon as I did, that song faded away and was replaced with another song, which felt like a suggestion for a replacement of the loving mantra. When I accepted that mantra too, calmness returned to my mind.
As I adopted the new mantras, the positive effects I experienced enhanced the importance of being dynamic in my meditation practice.

The mantras I initially selected were conceptually sound, but the ones that arose organically within me felt like they had a deeper connection to my inner state, and they flowed much more smoothly. Where the previous mantras had felt like they needed to be coerced into being, and kept disappearing, these mantras flowed with ease, and rather made themselves re-appear.

On day 9 of the retreat I woke up and I had another song stuck in my head, this time very present and insistent, to the point where I felt compelled to really be with the song. That insistence continued, in my mind I kept hearing that song, and feeling a strong urge to interact with it, and any attempts to replace it with either of my chosen mantras, or to just focus on my practice as normal, just felt jarring. After a while I decided to see where this would lead so I went and got my headphones so I could listen to the song and fully give in to it and see where that would take me. Gradually the content of the song started seeming more and more appropriate to my practice and my life: it seemed to be speaking clearly about where I perceived that I currently was in my practice, where it seemed like I needed to go, and what I needed to see. I tend to look at things from the perspective of the Qabalah as well as the progress of insight and in those terms I perceived that I was by the Abyss on the Tree of Life. This felt very relevant and reasonable considering that I felt like I was on the verge of passing out of the Dark Night. When these realisations landed properly, and I surrendered to them, that song went away and was replaced by the mantra I had be using for the past days and I felt like I had passed through into Equanimity.

I had some really interesting experiences and developments with being able to see/generate tunnels in the visual field (which I haven’t had before, not even when doing psychedelics) and which seemed to be really helpful for exploring the fifth Jhana, and the fifth Jhanic factor. The feeling of depth in the visual field that the tunnels lead to resulted in experiences of expansion and infinity, that also spread to the other sense doors in a deep and profound way.

These experiences seem to have unlocked something, and even quite some time after the retreat there is an openness so that tunnels in the visual field are accessible in a way that I was not expecting at all before the retreat.

Healing

Getting to have this dedicated time, and in such a positive and supported context, allowed me to generate space where my mind could communicate with me more clearly, and which allowed space for healing, which was not something I had intended, or expected. A couple of these instances were particularly clear and memorable. One that happened early on in the retreat was when I was experiencing a bunch of worries about a specific, worldy issue, and had been ruminating on this for a while, when, during a sit, one distinct, clear and bright, photo-realistic image appeared in my mind. This image, simple yet profound, felt like a gentle reminder that reassured me that by focusing on what truly matters, there was no need to worry, things would work out, regardless of what the worldly outcome was.

Another very clear example was related to a dear friend’s passing in 2020. During the retreat I basically didn’t check my phone, although with the exception that we needed to be available for the people who were looking after our dog, who we were leaving for an extended period for the first time. One night when I had just gotten to bed I saw a notification about a Google photo memory and since it was almost exactly a year since we had gotten our puppy I thought it would be photos of him, and since I missed him deeply, I wanted to see him. However, it turned out it was the anniversary of my friend’s passing. She got diagnosed with cancer in the beginning of 2020 and 6 months later she was gone, at a time when me and my partner were already dealing with a personal hell in form of injuries, pain, and mental health issues. It was a very dark and difficult time. When I saw the photo, I didn’t want to engage with those feelings and memories, and I didn’t really think about it further.

That night I had a bunch of vivid dreams, which is not usual for me, but I didn’t really make much of it, apart from finding some things funny and peculiar. I went for a seated meditation – and then suddenly everything came together with a feeling of an implosion, and it absolutely broke me. However, being in this supporting environment meant that I was in a space to finally acknowledge, and deal with, my grief. The people around me were so fantastic and loving – they helped so much and it healed some deep wounds that I didn’t even really know that I was carrying around. I didn’t know how much I had been clinging to those knots, and being in this environment made it possible for things to come to the surface in a way where they could be properly dealt with, and in some sense let go off.

Asana Practice

At home we practice a lot of Ashtanga Vinyasa Yoga, and I found that including an Ashtanga Vinyasa Yoga session every day worked really well. Ashtanga Vinyasa Yoga was popularized by Sri K. Pattabhi Jois in the 20th century and is a dynamic form of yoga that combines breath, movement, and postures in specific sequences. The practice involves synchronizing the breath with a progressive series of asanas. I have practised the primary sequence more times than I can count, so it was easy to maintain strong concentration and focus throughout the sessions. The first, obvious benefit, is to work through the body to remove tensions and opening the body up for better handling the physical aspects of the sits. In addition to that though, I felt that some of the loosening up that happened with regards to the sensory input from the visual field became very clear and visceral with regards to the other sense doors as well, especially the auditory and tactile perceptions. I felt like this helped the overarching experience of loosening and lessening of fabrications, and was also highly enjoyable.

Another interesting aspect with regards to the asana practice was that despite being in this big, beautiful house, we subconsciously felt compelled to practice on the lower levels, instead of outside, or upstairs, which both had stunning views. When we noticed, which took quite a while, that we seemed to be drawn to the basement for yoga sessions, and felt into it, we realised that this seemed to be coming from a desire to include some more of the Earth element. The lower level had something of a cave like feel and energy to it, and the Ashtanga practice in and of itself is quite grounding.
In addition to these sessions I felt compelled to do a lot of seated sessions outside with the sky, or the horizon, as focus, which, when thinking more about the elemental aspects, seemed to stem from desire for including the Air element. I had understood that elemental balancing might be desirable, but I had more been thinking of it as the importance of making sure to have Water to counteract the Fire, not as much the importance of balancing them all.

Magick

The Fire Kasina practice is renowned for promoting siddhis, or magical powers, but even so I hadn’t really expected the extent to which this would be the case. Synchronicities were happening left, right and centre, on all levels, and seemingly for everyone., to the point where even the ones that would normally have been mind-blowing, felt commonplace. People were stealing each others oddly colored nimittas and mantras, coming up with the same ideas independently, and having oddly rhyming experiences.
I drew 3 tarot cards every morning and quite quickly they just started to be laughably spot on. As one poignant example, when I drew the final tarot card, asking the tarot to summarize the retreat, I drew the 2 of Cups – Love, which (unexpectedly) to me had been the overarching theme for the retreat.

Another clear example were the differences travelling to the retreat, compared to travelling back home. On the way there, everything was confusing and difficult, in different ways for each flight, whereas on the way home we got off the first plane and a man was standing there with a sign that said “Auckland”, he put stickers on us so he wouldn’t loose us, then guided us through the airport, through security and all the way to our gate, and made sure we got in the right queue. That return trip was one of the smoothest travels I’ve ever done.

Even the standard, low-key, magical rituals that we performed every day took on a more dramatic sense. Doing the sun adorations 4 times a day was a beautiful way of deepening the connection with the Sun, fire and the fire element aspects in a devotional manner, and these rituals became increasingly powerful as the retreat went on.
The Fire Kasina practice is quite amazing in that it brings you to states that are conducive for creating really playful, fun and energetic sessions together with other people. On one of the last evenings a few of us ended up doing a session with drawing in the air and creating energy objects, which was so much fun, and deepened connections. Not being a very visual person, and suddenly being able to draw in the air and leave traces, in the color of my choosing, did so much for the Faith aspect in Nekos Triad (Neko’s Triad: Patience, Faith, and Curiosity, see Fire Kasina Glossary), and I think that session was invaluable for faith, confidence, inspiration, and for allowing myself to really have fun and play with things.

As the culmination of magical practice me and my partner performed an unofficial Gnostic Mass on the final evening. The Gnostic Mass is an involved group ritual combining Eucharistic, alchemical, and gnostic elements. Led by a Priest and Priestess, it involves the symbolic consumption of the Eucharist, represented by the “Cake of Light” and wine. The ritual is rich with symbolism and energy transfers and it was so incredibly beautiful to get to do with the mind this concentrated and powered up. Symbols, divine representations, and energies became so visceral and the sense of love, adoration, gratitude and beauty were almost overwhelming. I am deeply grateful to the other people at the retreat for creating such a wonderful environment, and for providing such fantastic energy and beauty to the ritual.

Conclusion

Discovering the Fire Kasina practice, and this retreat, has been life changing in such deep and positive ways. The simplicity of the practice, yet the incredibly power of it, is astounding and the possibilities seem endless. Not to mention that this is a super fun practice with so much opportunities for play and exploration.

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